


Gamzee: Don't Let Go

by MyLife



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Death from Old Age, Depression, Implied Suicide Attempt, Old Age, Pale Romance | Moirallegiance, Sadstuck, implied self harm, letting go, sad!Stuck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-26
Updated: 2013-12-26
Packaged: 2018-01-06 06:39:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1103640
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MyLife/pseuds/MyLife
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gamzee knew it was coming. Karkat was a mutant blood, he was a indigo blood. There lifespans were no where near the same. But he still wasn't ready to lose his best friend.</p><p>T for implied self harm, and language.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Gamzee: Don't Let Go

Your name is Gamzee Makara and right now you watch as the life slips out of your best friend. You know deep in your heart that it's his time, but you refuse to let him go.

Karkat Vantas lays on the bed next to you, holding your hand trying to treasure you, but his grip is weak and his eyes can't focus on you properly.

You feel your throat tighten as you look him over. His hair was more of a dark gray than a black and his skin sagged in an unnatural way. Most of all though, your friend looked tired. More tired than you had ever seen him. It crushed your heart to see him like this but you knew it would completely devestate you if he left completely.

Karkat weakly lifts his head and stares you in the eyes. Purple to red. Royal to mutant. Friend to best motherfucking friend. "Gamz. I'm so sorry." His voice isn't angry like usual. In favt you hadnt heard him angry in at least a sweep. The voice he uses is weak and frail instead. So unlike the Karkat you knew.

"Karbro, don't you all up and say sorry. You ain't done nothing wrong, cause you aren't gonna leave me. I won't let you." Indigo tears brim your eyes, and you clutch his hand tighter.

Karkat gives you a weak smile. "I'm sorry not all of us are as superiorly blooded as you.... fuckass." He adds that last part in their for you. He knows that you hate your blood and is trying to make you feel better, in his own strange way..... but it's not working.

"Shut the motherfuck up!" You say, tears spilling down you cheeks. "You CAN'T leave me. Not after Tavbro. Not after Aradia. I can't lose you too!" You pull your hand back from his tender grip and jump up from your seat next to his bed, sending it skidding behind you, and begin pacing the small room.

Karkat had been there as Tavros had died, less than half a sweep ago. He had hugged you and shooshed you as your matesprite had drained away the same as Karkat was now. He kept you from killing yourself when you thought you couldn't handle the pain. Stayed awake at night when you couldnt sleep, as sobbs racked your body. Who would do that now? Who could ever replace the little angry troll with the nubby horns that had become your best friend, your Morail?

"You have no right to leave me alone!" You practically scream at him hysterically. 

You wait a second before adding the next part a bit gentler. "I can't live without you, Karbro."

Karkat only looks at you for a moment, taking deep ragged breaths, as if his windbags cant get enough air. "I need you to promise me something." He finally says barely more than a whisper.

"Karkat...." You start, only to be cut off by his insistent whisper again.

"No Gamzee. I'm serious. Promise that you won't do anything stupid while I'm gone." His eyes are pleading. He knows how much he's asking of you, how big of a tabor he's asking.

"I- I...." You try to think of an excuse. A reason you can't keep his final wish.

"Please Gamz." A tear slips down his face in that unfortunate mutant blood color that would soon cause his end. 

Suddenly its all to much for you and you cave. You know Karkat's hanging by a thread, and arguing wont change anything.

"I promise motherfucker." You whisper back as you pull the chair back towards his bed and sut back down. You begin to stroke his hair rub his horns affectionately. He purrs ever so slightly at the contact.

"Thank you." He takes one last look at you before finally closing his eyes, letting them rest one final time.

You let your tear fall silently down you cheeks, smearing that stupid makeup you still wore. You knew there was nothing you could do to keep him here, to stop his life from slipping through your fingers. 

So is the life of a high blood. To live above the others. To watch their deaths time and time again, while you lived on. You knew this was your role, yet you hated it.

"I'll be waiting." Karkat says finally, so gently that you barely catch it as his final breath leaves his body.

"I'll be there soon enough motherfucker..." You whisper back to the now empty room.

You may have let Karkat leave, but you promise that you'll never him let go.


End file.
